I have decided to chose the first and final draft of my Food For Thought Analysis paper because that is where I think I did the most improvement between the two drafts. Some specific changes I made was to look at the suggestions made by my peers. Some particular suggestions were to add quotes to strengthen your writing and to introduce them as well. We also talked about the templates in the book, “They Say, I Say”. The book offers models that show how to start a paragraph or introduce a quote. I used some of the templates to present the quotes I used. It was also discussed in class to look back at the corrections made to our final draft of our first paper. Jesse had suggested that I include more topic sentences and outline my thesis. These were significant issues in Paper 1 that I focused on for Paper 2. I also added more ideas to my final draft compared to my first draft. I had gotten these ideas from the in-class discussion about the articles and journals. There was also an intense peer revision session where not only did my peers tell me what needs to be improved but they helped me develop it and suggested other ideas that I could build off of. I took the criticism and used it to produce a better quality paper. In the peer group session, we focused on global issues, not sentence levels. I also learned how to revise my paper and take my peers’ comments into consideration. I didn’t ask them about their comments in the beginning, during Paper 1, but learned to ask more. I wondered why they suggested certain things and if they pointed out something was wrong, I asked them how it could be fixed.
